[The following dubious material is rapped. Or rather it starts out spoken normally (monotonously) before it turns into a rap.]

There's a polar bear
In our Frigidaire—
He likes it 'cause it's cold in there.
With his seat in the meat
And his face in the fish
And his big hairy paws
In the buttery dish,
He's nibbling the noodles,
He's munching the rice,
He's slurping the soda,
He's licking the ice.
And he lets out a roar
If you open the door.
And it gives me a scare
To know he's in there—
That polary bear
In our Fridgitydaire.

[And then he switches to text.]

hey so happy birthday
congrats on a new milestone you have officially aged in accordance to space fleet rules
or maybe not its not like i know what month it was when they kidnapped you
maybe youre cheating and having a second bday in like four months
lets get food